Unsolicited dick pics

• Do you send unsolicited dick pics?

• Are they well received?

• Why do you do it?

• If you don't send them do you call out other men who do?

Apparently it’s a thing. 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️

As women we know it's a thing. Unfortunately happens all too often here.

As a man, I don't get it. If I approached a woman in a bar, I wouldn't greet her by flashing my knob. So why is it different here or online? Baffles me.

If a woman really wanted to see my junk, I figure she'd ask.

Don't get it. Not sure what others get out of it. I feel there are much more attractive parts of myself I would rather show someone. And I don't even send a pic without being prompted or asking first. And I won't even offer till I know the person fairly well.

I send back a nice picture of my new 8" Wüsthof slicing some bratwurst. So far, they've all gotten the point.

No. Never. I think it’s crazy.

Quote by WannabeWordsmith

As a man, I don't get it. If I approached a woman in a bar, I wouldn't greet her by flashing my knob. So why is it different here or online? Baffles me.

If a woman really wanted to see my junk, I figure she'd ask.

Because online, whether it is in chat or whether it is in Lush mail, the women are treated very, very poorly. And every time they complain, they are told to block. Rather than tell the guy to stop harassment.

There are some tiny dickwards that are serial offenders. In fact, the guy in the screenshot I posted up above, proudly told me he does it quite often. He knows he can get away with it. He just was stupid enough to try it with the moderator, who’s not going to buy into victim blaming culture. Neither should any of the women on Lush.

I don’t think the women are going to be standing for it anymore.

I love Lush, I want people to post selfies. I want people to enjoy feeling that they have a right to be fabulously pervy. The men and the women, should be able to post stories, they should be able to post pictures. Lush has such a powerful supportive community, standing up and telling the people that are harassing women (especially women because of misogyny), that this behaviour will not be tolerated, will only make Lush stronger, in the forum, in chat & with stories.

It is also awesome when admin stand behind the women of Lush, because these assholes know that harassment will not be tolerated.

Thank you WW for publicly saying how disgusting this is. :worship:

Vee.... I couldn't say it any better than you have just done. I agree with every word. It's a good job i'm not a Mod, lol. Cos the membership numbers would drop, significantly . The 'meatmarket' mentality of SOME guys is totally at odds with this modern world. That they can get away with it so easily is reprehensible, there really SHOULD be some kind of sanction imposed. Maybe not an outright ban, but a month suspension for EVERY time it's done, should make them think twice before re-offending. ( I use the word offending in every sense of the word).

I would find it quite peculiar if I were to get an unsolicited pussy pic, so...

Firstly thank you to the men who have commented. This post has had 28 likes and 145 views.But only 4 comments from men. As a woman this is hugely disappointing.

Too often women are harassed here on lush be it mailbox or in the chat rooms and let me be clear and unsolicited dick pic isn't just harassment it is legally sexually harassment. Women are told by mods and members to block, report them and to ignore them. The offender gets a slap on the wrist at best and then carries on with said behaviour.

What I was hoping when I posted this question was more men speaking up and calling out this behaviour, reinforcing that it is wrong and women deserve to be respected it. Instead it's been largely met by silence and for me silence is complicity. "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing"

I know that there are plenty of good men here, I am friends with quite a few. So here is my ask, and it isn't a big ask.

Be an active ally. Call out bad behaviour. And do it publicly. As women we say no, but often our no's are not listened to but when a man steps in and says no on behalf of us the offender listens. It shouldn't be that way but it is. But that's why we need your support.

Women are here because they enjoy lush, because we have our needs and desires we shouldn't have to experience harassment on a regular basis and Lush should be a safe space for everyone.

Quote by Busty_Minx
This post has had 28 likes and 145 views.But only 4 comments from men

That's a better ratio than my stories get! What's your secret? 😎

I guess many men are majorly insecure. The whole "size matters" thing is still prevalent in endless movie quotes and the media at large, exacerbating this need to overcompensate. You've only got to look at how many blokes splash out on a penis extension sports car as a symbol of how successful they are. Doesn't explain the people with delusions of grandeur who send out ropey, wizened worm shots in the vain hope that someone likes it.

Presumably, such men think the more pics they send, the more chance they'll have of scoring pussy. In reality, I suspect it has the opposite effect, but when it's so easy to spam your wang on a porn site where the perpetrator wrongly assumes everyone here is gagging for it, a single "hit" from a few hundred is going to seem good odds.

I honestly don't know what we can do beyond advising people to block and report these people. I'm not sure where the "slap on the wrist, then nothing" view comes from. Reports of harassment of a member against a single other user, let alone across multiple members, are dealt with seriously and the member suspended/banned in most cases.

If you don't think mods are being harsh enough with suspensions, we can review how we deal with offenders. I'm all for weeding out vermin.

There are also members, seemingly with vastly needy egos, who start or spam as many threads as possible with pictures of themselves, and we clean them up as soon as we spot them, or they're reported. Unfortunately, many individuals see this cat and mouse behaviour as a sport. Never often enough to be a serious threat, but it's low-level irritation. At the expense of getting blowback for being Draconian, it's getting to the point I'm seriously considering hitting the Nuke button on a few accounts because such behaviour is not in the spirit of the site as an inclusive space for people to enjoy themselves.

Please work with us to help stamp out harassing behaviour. I'm not entirely sure how I, or any man, can step in and call out bad behaviour in an IM conversation between some dickpicker and his prey. We don't sit around combing people's conversations! The only reliable thing to do at present is for the victim to block and report them, and someone can then take action. Happy to consider other feasible options if you have any ideas.

Quote by WannabeWordsmith

That's a better ratio than my stories get! What's your secret? 😎

I guess many men are majorly insecure. The whole "size matters" thing is still prevalent in endless movie quotes and the media at large, exacerbating this need to overcompensate. You've only got to look at how many blokes splash out on a penis extension sports car as a symbol of how successful they are. Doesn't explain the people with delusions of grandeur who send out ropey, wizened worm shots in the vain hope that someone likes it.

Presumably, such men think the more pics they send, the more chance they'll have of scoring pussy. In reality, I suspect it has the opposite effect, but when it's so easy to spam your wang on a porn site where the perpetrator wrongly assumes everyone here is gagging for it, a single "hit" from a few hundred is going to seem good odds.

I honestly don't know what we can do beyond advising people to block and report these people. I'm not sure where the "slap on the wrist, then nothing" view comes from. Reports of harassment of a member against a single other user, let alone across multiple members, are dealt with seriously and the member suspended/banned in most cases.

If you don't think mods are being harsh enough with suspensions, we can review how we deal with offenders. I'm all for weeding out vermin.

There are also members, seemingly with vastly needy egos, who start or spam as many threads as possible with pictures of themselves, and we clean them up as soon as we spot them, or they're reported. Unfortunately, many individuals see this cat and mouse behaviour as a sport. Never often enough to be a serious threat, but it's low-level irritation. At the expense of getting blowback for being Draconian, it's getting to the point I'm seriously considering hitting the Nuke button on a few accounts because such behaviour is not in the spirit of the site as an inclusive space for people to enjoy themselves.

Please work with us to help stamp out harassing behaviour. I'm not entirely sure how I, or any man, can step in and call out bad behaviour in an IM conversation between some dickpicker and his prey. We don't sit around combing people's conversations! The only reliable thing to do at present is for the victim to block and report them, and someone can then take action. Happy to consider other feasible options if you have any ideas.

The tits are the secret 😉

We aren't here to be therapists for men with small dick energy.

Why are we trying to justify bad behaviour. Everyone knows showing their dick to stranger is wrong. It isn't something to rationalise.

On my profile I have dick pic rules in my gallery amongst my personal photos and my bio is abundantly clear. I know other women who also clearly say on their profiles don't send me a dick pic and yet it still happens.

As women we do everything we can and it still happens because there are some men that think that our boundaries do need to be respected.

Last year I reported someone for sending a dick pic in my mailbox the response was along the line lines of " there's nothing we can do about it, just block the person" there was no ban or suspension in place. The person that prompted this post has been reported, and been told that they have been "warned" (I only heard this because I'm friends with some mods - nothing official against my report )and told to apologise. That apologily still hasn't arrived.

So no it isn't taken seriously.

In response to how it is called out - we aren't asking you or anyone else to come through pms.

But when you see someone publicly telling someone to stop sending dick pics - back them up. Yesterday when this was called out and the offender was openly taunting a mod and bragging about the fact he was repeatedly sending her dick pics EVERY man in the room was SILENT!!! It's onlyme and one other female who has also been sent his damn pics that stood up for the mod.

Today a man I am very close to called out this person I'm the rooms ina very polite way and suggested that he apologised to those women who he harassed. Both Venus and I and then several other women engaged in a calm reasonable conversation. The offender double downed:

"Other men send dick pick"

"Its a conversation starter"

"Not every man who sends a dick pic is a pervert"

That warning he had really worked well didn't it?

It was only when my friend and 3-4 other men joined and called him out on his shitty behaviour that he tried to back down claiming that he "doesn't remember what happened" he was arrogant enough to say that "he wishes Lush was stricter so he couldn't do such things" he then he tried to play the pity party card. He eventually shut up as the good men in the room continued to be vocal with the women.

Calling it out works.

How to improve this situation:

1) make it a clear site and chat rule to not send unsolicited gentialia photos and videos (including invites to private galleries without discussion) with the warning that your account will be cancelled if one doesn't not adhere to the rules.

2) if someone makes a report - a formal update with the outcome of said report needs to be sent to the mailbox e.g if someone has been banned tell the victim.

3) immediate 3 day suspension for a first offence. Followed by the removal of genitalia photos and unable to upload additional photos for two weeks after they return. With a warning that breach of the site rules on unsolicited images means they will no longer be able add said images to the profile

4) two week suspension for the second offence. Permanent removal and ban of gentilia pics

5) a third offence a complete Lush ban including IP address

6) victims to report EVERY unsolicited pic they receive

7) stop putting ownership and responsibility to be left alone on those that have been abused

I don't think any of the above seven points are unreasonable or unfeasible.

Women do not need to be nice or tolerant to men who are overstep boundaries so don't expect us to.

I have never, nor would I ever send a dick pic to a female that I was not involved with, either a close friend whom I know was wanting that, or in a relationship with one. There is simply no reason for doing that randomly, and I know women have to put up with it constantly. i have seen on almost every adult site I have been on. Disgraceful conduct that can ruin it for everyone.

Well, from this old mans' point of view, this is a sex site but NO ONE man or woman should have to tolerate unsolicited pics or posts of any sort, and anyone who indulges in such rude unwelcome behaviour should be blocked and reported to the Mods. Surely it;s only common decency to ask a person first before you risk offending them with offensive pics ?

Quote by yurigagarin

Well, from this old mans' point of view, this is a sex site but NO ONE man or woman should have to tolerate unsolicited pics or posts of any sort, and anyone who indulges in such rude unwelcome behaviour should be blocked and reported to the Mods. Surely it;s only common decency to ask a person first before you risk offending them with offensive pics ?

What should happen to said perpetrators?

First offemce - a clear warning

Second offence - total Lush ban

1) I never send unsolicited pics. If they want to see them, there are some on my public profile and if they express interest then can consider sharing more.
2) My pics are generally well received because only those who want to see them will see them in the first place. (And if they were not well received because, I don't know, maybe I'm ugly lol they've generally had the kindness not to say so.)
3) Not applicable
4) I don't personally interact with anyone who I know has exhibited this behavior, on or off Lush.

Fully agree should not be done and more steps needed to be taken against those who do send them

I never send anything unless specifically requested. Just not who I am.. as far as what to do when it happens.. I can imagine as ladies, yall probably get inundated with this sort of thing.. sadly, some like it.. which i think might be the reason it isnt corrected with a harsher hand.. I have been told as much by several women.. I wish I knew how to help fix the problem.. maybe the answer is to communicate within the groups. Or maybe even create a group to report these types of people amongst ourselves.. then those that do want it fixed can at least help keep an eye out for each other.. think that might be useful when guys create multiple accounts as well. Sad this continues to be a problem

I'm not sure what's the best way to handle unsolicited dick-pics. I get them a few times a month in my DMs, cuz I've long since stopped venturing into the chat-rooms. I figure they want a reaction, so I simply don't acknowledge it at all. and deny them the satisfaction of knowing whether I even looked at it. It usually stops when they don't get any feedback. It's kind of pitiful behavior, but then, I understand exhibitionists, being one myself.

I never send unsolicited dick pics! It seems to me a really aggressive and unfriendly thing to do. Why alienate people? Why not find out what they (in this case obviously mostly women) would like from you (if anything)?

RULE 1) Don't send a dick pic unless she asks you to send a dick pic

RULE 2) About to send a dick pic? Stop. Ask yourself, do I know this person well enough were there is a 99% chance said pic will be appreciated. I didn't think so, don't send the pic.

RULE 3) See rule #1

It's not hard... be kind and not a creep.

Quote by leftlingula

RULE 1) Don't send a dick pic unless she asks you to send a dick pic

RULE 2) About to send a dick pic? Stop. Ask yourself, do I know this person well enough were there is a 99% chance said pic will be appreciated. I didn't think so, don't send the pic.

RULE 3) See rule #1

It's not hard... be kind and not a creep.

This again.. Honestly... they dont want to see your small little dick. Youre pathetic if you think this will attract women. Try using your head and words.. try having a personality. If your endgame is your cock then then you have no game.

Grow the fuck up.

Oh and the mods and admins need to come down on these asshats. You ladies zshould report them and these boys (yes boys) should get 3 strikes then banned. Fuck em..

In the UK, (where the site is based, and the law which Lush sets it's standards off of) 'cyberflashing' is illegal, and considered a sexual crime. So, by accepting the T's & C's and also agreeing to the AUP, nobody should be sending unsolicited images.

If you are in a Forum, Chatroom, or Group, then you are likely going to find what you are searching for - or there abouts.

Send us snacks and flowers, not your little willies.

Quote by Georgia_27_8

In the UK, (where the site is based, and the law which Lush sets it's standards off of) 'cyberflashing' is illegal, and considered a sexual crime. So, by accepting the T's & C's and also agreeing to the AUP, nobody should be sending unsolicited images.

If you are in a Forum, Chatroom, or Group, then you are likely going to find what you are searching for - or there abouts.

Send us snacks and flowers, not your little willies.

Quote by Georgia_27_8

In the UK, (where the site is based, and the law which Lush sets it's standards off of) 'cyberflashing' is illegal, and considered a sexual crime. So, by accepting the T's & C's and also agreeing to the AUP, nobody should be sending unsolicited images.

If you are in a Forum, Chatroom, or Group, then you are likely going to find what you are searching for - or there abouts.

Send us snacks and flowers, not your little willies.

@wannabewordsmith does this mean that every report is then filed with police since it is a sex crime?

I don't get very many dick pics, probably because I'm "mature" and I stay the hell away from the chat room thingies. 99% of the men here are lovely gentlemen perverts and don't flash their knob in my inbox without asking or me requesting. If I like a man, I will ask to see him and if he wishes to share all of himself I'm happy to see all of him. I think the ones who do send dick & wank pics without permission are the same men that used to make obscene phone calls, or open their trench coats at the park, or sit in their car outside the school, exposing themselves and hoping to shock and frighten women. Your basic shitty misogynist misanthrope that certainly doesn't belong in our lovely Lush community.

Quote by Busty_Minx

@wannabewordsmith does this mean that every report is then filed with police since it is a sex crime?

Here on Lush, as I'm sure you area aware; we have certain subjects which are instantly bannable on a permanent basis, where assistance of local authorities is requested - as/when needed.

Otherwise, as I'm sure you are also aware; we use a stepping-stone procedure for onsite enforcement of rules where anyone fails to comply with the T's & C's and AUP. This can lead to an educational and friendly warning or a permanent ban from the site without notice depending on the severity of the offence.