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The Funniest Puns You Can Laugh at in 2017

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lindalines
Rookie Scribe
I gathered for you the funniest puns you can always use:

eBay is so useless. I tried to look up lighters and all they had was 13,749 matches.

I relish the fact that you’ve mustard the strength to ketchup to me.

Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards.

I couldn’t work out how to fasten my seatbelt. Then it clicked.

I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory.


Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth, then it just becomes a soap opera.


What do you call an academically successful slice of bread? An honor roll.

What do you call an academically successful slice of bread? An honor roll.

taken from [url=https://]funny puns[/url]
ShamelessFlirt
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by lindalines

Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards.

taken from [url=https://]funny puns[/url]


At least they didn't make a clean getaway.


A Zen master visiting New York City goes up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything."
The hot dog vendor fixes a hot dog and hands it to the Zen master, who pays with a $20 bill.
The vendor puts the bill in the cash box and closes it. "Excuse me, but where’s my change?" asks the Zen master.
The vendor responds, "Change must come from within."