Let's Get Serious: Animal Match-Ups

Quote by WellMadeMale

5 Battery/NYC raised harbor rats vs Roger Stone.

my money is on them hashing things out and Stone joining the pack.

Quote by sprite

pack of feral cats vs shark

My money's on the cats.

Sharks are terrible fighters on land.

Quote by Dani

Quit picking on Noll.

Noll vs 10 bee-sized bears.

Can the bears fly and is noll naked?

Quote by Magical_felix

Can the bears fly and is noll naked?

The bears can fly. Noll is not naked. He's dressed for 108-degree weather.

Quote by Dani

The bears can fly. Noll is not naked. He's dressed for 108-degree weather.

If noll only has minimal clothing like shorts and a tank top and no weapons like flyswatters or anything like that then I think the bears would win.

1 silverback gorilla vs 4 adult male baboons

Quote by Magical_felix

1 silverback gorilla vs 4 adult male baboons

Hell of a fight, but I say baboons.

Gorilla is strong, but baboons are generally fucking vicious, and fast, and they're strong too for their size.

2 fully grown silverback gorillas versus 3 fully grown chimps.

Quote by Dani

Hell of a fight, but I say baboons.

Gorilla is strong, but baboons are generally fucking vicious, and fast, and they're strong too for their size.

2 fully grown silverback gorillas versus 3 fully grown chimps.

I feel the gorillas could knock the head off the chimps.

A fighting cock with the knives tied to its feet vs a chihuahua.

Quote by Magical_felix

I feel the gorillas could knock the head off the chimps.

A fighting cock with the knives tied to its feet vs a chihuahua.

The chicken.

Rottweiler vs. German Shephard, both in their prime.

Quote by Dani

The bears can fly. Noll is not naked. He's dressed for 108-degree weather.

I would stand in line for this.

The Grizzly will eat the anaconda.

How about Everglades python vs Ron DeSantis?

Does the python get to use its fingers when it's eating Ron's gooey parts?

The Thing (1982) vs The Thing (2011) :

Setting: Antarctica

Octopus vs ted Cruz while snorkeling in Cancun.

Quote by WellMadeMale

Does the python get to use its fingers when it's eating Ron's gooey parts?

The Thing (1982) vs The Thing (2011) :

Setting: Antarctica

Well, Ron Desantis is very short. He wears lifts in his shoes. So, if he stayed real still, maybe the python, or The Thing, might not notice him.

Actually, everyone should ignore Ron, and he might waddle away.

I love the 1982 The Thing. Great movie!

Quote by WellMadeMale

Does the python get to use its fingers when it's eating Ron's gooey parts?

The Thing (1982) vs The Thing (2011) :

Setting: Antarctica

The Thing (1982) would win hands down. While it takes longer to absorb and change its cells than the 2011 version. It is more intelligent, preferring to hide in its imitation rather than attacking out in the open where everyone can see it.

Two Habus (a venomous snake in Japan and Okinawa) vs one mongoose. I already know the answer to this one.

Quote by Magical_felix

If noll only has minimal clothing like shorts and a tank top and no weapons like flyswatters or anything like that then I think the bears would win.

They'd win no matter what.

#lovernotafighter ✌️

You start out in a large house, 6 rooms, three baths, all the entrances are sealed. The doors in the inside of the house have been removed.

You have noll, shrunk down to the size of a chihuahua, trapped in there with a Burmese Python. No weapons. And noll is naked.

Will noll last 24 hours?

Quote by Magical_felix

You start out in a large house, 6 rooms, three baths, all the entrances are sealed. The doors in the inside of the house have been removed.

You have noll, shrunk down to the size of a chihuahua, trapped in there with a Burmese Python. No weapons. And noll is naked.

Will noll last 24 hours?

3 questions:

• When was the the last time the python had a proper meal?

• What's your obsession with me being naked?

• Is one of those baths a standalone bathtub?

Quote by noll

3 questions:

• When was the the last time the python had a proper meal?

• What's your obsession with me being naked?

• Is one of those baths a standalone bathtub?

The python is ravenous.

The python is naked too. It's about fairness...

No, it's all walk-in showers. Doors removed.

Quote by Magical_felix

The python is naked too. It's about fairness...

So the python is also shrunk to chihuahua size then?

Quote by noll

So the python is also shrunk to chihuahua size then?

The python is full size. Larger than average.

Quote by Magical_felix

The python is full size. Larger than average.

How's that fair?

Quote by noll

How's that fair?

Because the python has a fucking snake brain, noll.

Now would you survive 24 hours or not

Quote by Magical_felix

Because the python has a fucking snake brain, noll.

Now would you survive 24 hours or not

How would I know? I've never seen the world from a chihuahua perspective. I'm Dutch remember? We're one of the taller people around.

Is there some socialite/influencer, or wannabe, who'll carry me around in their purse?

Fully grown moose (male) in his prime vs a fully grown male moose-sized WellMadeMale in his prime.

Oh wait, I was naked, so I guess that's a no. Hmm…

Quote by Dani

Fully grown moose (male) in his prime vs a fully grown male moose-sized WellMadeMale in his prime.

Is this the history channel now? 😄

Quote by Dani

Fully grown moose (male) in his prime vs a fully grown male moose-sized WellMadeMale in his prime.

Does Wellmademale have any weapons and is he naked?

Quote by noll

How would I know? I've never seen the world from a chihuahua perspective. I'm Dutch remember? We're one of the taller people around.

Is there some socialite/influencer, or wannabe, who'll carry me around in their purse?

Sounds like you wouldn’t even last 24 minutes, snake food.

Quote by Magical_felix

Does Wellmademale have any weapons and is he naked?

WMM does not have weapons, and he is dressed for brunch.