"OK, I'll give you that one," Julia said with a smile.

Julia's challenge to Mick to talk her into bed without a single tired line or cliche had been one he had been keen to accept. However, he knew his limitations, and when Julia asked him to explain his plans to entertain her, his brisk walk into his kitchen surprised her.

Mick had never imagined his coffee mug or the recently bought treat for his dog would have proved to be this useful, although Julia's look of delight suggested otherwise.

"A fanny mug and a tin of ox tongue? An image I shall never forget, however hard I try," Julia said, her amusement battling with interest in what was implied for prime position in her thoughts.

Undressing each other while having a fit of giggles was a new experience for Julia and Mick. Julia commented that she was glad the dog hadn't been bought chickens' feet and saw Mick smile and laugh heartily, ensuring everything remained joyfully comical.

"I think I'll just keep quiet and not risk dropping a cliche bomb," Mick said as he stroked and kissed Julia's legs.

Mick's fingertips and lips rose up Julia's legs as he kneeled between them; Julia's mind, meanwhile, was filled with dreamy thoughts and visions of Glaswegian supermarket shelves.

"It's about thirty-five years too late to sing 'Deflowered Of Scotland', but that mug's done the strangest of things to my mind," Julia said as her body turned as fizzy as Irn Bru, and she felt Mick slip his fingers inside it.

Mick decided his self-imposed vow of silence shouldn't include laughter, and so his touch circled to the sound of it before his lips and tongue took their place and eased into Julia's excited wetness.

"I hope you've dressed for the weather; it's bucketing it down in there," Julia said with a giggle as she sensed her excitement gathering as well as her enjoyment of the erotic comedy show.

Mick's tongue swirled and lashed inside Julia's body as it shook with both laughter and sensual anticipation. Each movement brought new thoughts into Julia's head, and she was more than happy to maintain the commentary she had chosen to give.

"I'm getting giggly, jiggly, and wiggly," Julia announced as she felt Mick's lips purse on her swollen clit with a giggle, jiggle, and wiggle.

As Julia felt the intensity and depth of Mick's kisses inside her increase, her comments became interspersed with sighs and cries of delight and encouragement.

"I'm getting 'egg in the microwave' now; this one's going to splatter some serious yolk," Julia said, her voice breaking as Mick delivered a long, deep kiss that made her head spin and sent waves of erotic energy around her body.

Julia's climax sent laughter ringing out as she felt herself gripped by its sweetness and power. Mick continued to deliver his kisses, subduing Julia's writhing body with firm hands as he did so while still laughing at the images Julia's comments placed in his head.

Julia was delighted to see Mick more than happy to ensure she got full value from her sweet release. Once she had done so, she and Mick showered and dressed.

"You've had something warm, wet, and full of flavour from my fanny; now it's my turn to do the same from yours," Julia said with a dreamy grin.

Thankfully, despite his distracted thoughts, Mick understood, so he made Julia a nice cup of coffee in his chat-up mug, which she then drank with a smile and went home.