When it comes to men, I'm not a good friend. I was never to anyone, really. I can recognize now how selfish I had always been. I have always been the type to want my cake and eat it too, but for some reason, people always seemed to trust me, and I often abused that privilege to pacify my own desires, and the more I kept getting away with it, the more I wanted to do it.

I wanted to share something that happened about 7–9 years ago. The years just seem to overlap anymore, but I guess it's irrelevant. I was in my late 20s, for sure. My friend Sarah, who I still connect with to this day, began seeing some guy, one of several that I became involved with. I cannot remember his name, so I'll just call him Jacob.

Sarah had security issues, still does in fact, and also had begun to take this guy more seriously. She showed me some photos of him on her phone at some point. A pretty large, heavy-set guy with a soft face and smoother skin than mine. Clean-cut, it looked ideal for her. Then she asked if I would get on Snap and try to see if he could be seduced as a way to test him and see how faithful he would be to her.

This wasn't the first nor last time that I've had a friend ask me to pretend to be some random woman online to put their partner to the test, and I never put much thought before into why they ask me, but perhaps it's because they know that I'm flirty and also blonde with a well-endowed figure and think that if their potential partners would reject me, then that would mean they must really love them. So men, if you read this, then be aware that this is a thing that some women with security issues will do.

I wasn't even about to try too hard and figured if I was just blunt enough, he would get scared off. I don't remember if I sent him a message first or if I sent him a friend request first, but at any rate, we had begun chatting and swapping pics. The expectation was for me to make a seductive pass at him and report to Sarah how he replied. However, from what I remember, he was pretty good at keeping the conversation all about business while also complimenting how I look in my photos.

He was an avid businessman, and I probably told him that I worked for a large corporation, which I do, but since he was some kind of salesman or contractor, I forget exactly, but he was all about the networking. I asked if he could meet me sometime for coffee or lunch, and I remember his reply that he would. He made it sound to me like he was more interested in working his way into my corporate world, but I can't recall what exactly he said.

Suspicious, but not really a red flag either. I told Sarah, "Well, he wants to meet me for coffee," and I continued to inform her that there was no talk about meeting for any other reason than networking. I think she was partially relieved but still not convinced. For some reason, people with security issues have a constant focus on looking for reasons to distrust their partner. I tried to explain to her in the nicest way possible that the largest red flag in the room was her, but she talked me into meeting him for coffee and try one more time.

"Tell him you want to get a hotel room and see what he says." She made it sound like that if he tells me no, then she would forever be able to trust him, but I know people like her will eventually repeat the behavior all over again. But whatever.

The day of the meeting, I was a bit miffed that I had to use up my personal lunch break at work just to meet this guy, and at a Starbucks no less, which means I wasn't going to get enough time to go anywhere and grab a meal, but he mentioned Starbucks, so I had already agreed to it prior. I wanted it to be quick; however, my mood changed once we sat down and had some coffee. Actually, I think I had a hot chocolate. He seemed particularly interested in where I worked initially.

I unbuttoned the top two or three buttons on my blouse, as if I thought it was warm in there. I caught his eye wander quickly down to my now exposed cleavage. I drank mine as quickly as I could and broke his boring business chatter by asking if he'd like to get a hotel room with me, just for a quickie. I needed to get this moving because I only had, like, 20 or 30 minutes left of my lunch break at this point.

He looked as if I had hit him with a taser. Shocked and frozen in place. I smiled and probably said something further, and I don't really remember what, but I do remember his reply because I thought it was funny.

"Okay, well, your lunch menu certainly looks a lot better than this place."

At that point, I had the evidence that I needed, and certainly any friend would be expected to stop there. However, the situation kind of turned me on. I also began thinking that if Sarah finds this guy good enough in bed to make for a good partner, maybe I should try him on as if I'm borrowing an outfit for a single occasion. That's often how I tend to view my friend's boyfriends and husbands, merely an outfit that I just want to try on or borrow on occasion.

I never seem to view it as a big deal, and I often lack any empathy for how my friends would feel if they were to find out. So I just make sure that they don't, and I also try not to let them find out how slutty I actually tend to be. I have gone so far as to tell my friends and coworkers that I don't like sex very much as a way to make them less suspicious of me or appear less threatening.

After his reply, I knew he had fucked up. I knew Sarah would be very disappointed. I knew that their relationship would soon be over. I became slightly aroused, and the "dark one," as I call it, the part of my mind that thinks about abusing the trust of my friends for my own benefit, began to speak. I tried to justify it with what I thought was a very rational thought. If Sarah was going to dump him anyway, then it wouldn't really matter if I slept with him, would it? Little did I know that it would be years before I realized how often I tried to justify my reason for sleeping with another woman’s man.

I now had it in my mind that maybe I will go ahead and fuck him, just to experience one time what Sarah had experienced for the last time. I told him that if he got us a room, I would meet him there. He scrolled through his phone intently before making a call to ask if they had any suites available.

I shook my head. “We don’t need anything fancy; I won’t be able to stay long.” He gestured with his hand and a nod, I guess to indicate that it wasn’t a big deal to him. I took it that he had money to blow. He booked a room at the Embassy Suites and shrugged it off as no big deal. I thought it was overly excessive just for a fuck, but I guess when you grow up poor, you think poor. I called into work and said that I would take an extended lunch. They usually don’t make a big deal about things so long as you get your projects done by the due date.

He mentioned that he was going to make a stop to buy condoms, and while I’m not a fan, I suppose no one is really, I didn’t say anything. I usually tend to trust my friends' partners to be clean, more so than single guys. I don't know why, because as stupid as it is for me not to use a rubber, I’ve thus far been very lucky, but when you have a breeding kink and cum fetish, it makes it all the more intense.

The room was nice after we had a look around, and after freshening up, we both performed body flops on the bed. There’s just something about hotel beds that amuses me. I didn’t waste time taking my clothes off, and as I drew closer to him, his hands got quite busy fondling my 34DD-size breasts. I lay back and began to relax, just letting him grope and kiss me all over. He used his fingers to play with my pussy and gradually began to finger me.

I squeezed my pelvic floor muscles around his fingers as I began to imagine him filling me up. He hovered over me closer as his fingers slipped out of me, leaving me aching for more. He reached for the condoms and opened up the box. I was amused to see that he bought the Magnum brand, but he was just average-sized. I guess it helped his ego, so I didn’t mention it.

He mounted me, and I savored that initial pressure against my pussy just as it starts to enter. I love that feeling as it goes in for the first time and my inner vaginal walls expand as I wrap my legs around his waist. While not quite as gratifying as having him raw, his powerful thrusts, pounding his pelvis against my clit, felt good all the same. I could hear myself getting louder, but gave it little thought that any neighbors in the next room likely heard me loud and clear as the waves of electric pleasure (as I like to call it) washed across my body. I tensed up my legs, wrapping him tighter while trying to push him in deeper.

My back tried to arch upward, only to be stopped by the weight of his chest against mine. I dragged my nails across his back, then sank them into his butt cheeks like the teeth of a shark. Still moaning but only in gasps as an effort to quickly catch my breath. I then spoke into his ear, “I want to swallow you.”

He raised up with a look as if uncertain of what he heard, so I reiterated. “Let me suck you off.”

He gestured with a smirk and pulled out. I crossed my legs to sit up and pulled off his condom. For that first lick, I could still taste the weird flavor of the latex. I slurped and sucked. I dragged my tongue across his shaft. I soaked it with my saliva only to slurp it clean once more.

Then I went for my finishing technique. I puckered my lips tightly around his cock and sucked out the air in my mouth to form a tight seal. And with my tongue now pressed hard against the underside of his shaft, I worked it faster and faster. I must have looked like a woodpecker. He held one hand on the back of my head and the other squeezing my shoulder. I could hear him breathing harder. I could feel his cock begin to pulse in rhythmic fashion as he started to release my afternoon lunch straight down into the back of my throat.

Once I felt that he had released all he had, I pulled him out and began to play with his cum in my mouth. Warm, slimy, and viscous, he had a seemingly equal mix of salty and sweet. I often struggle to define its taste. Some guys taste more sweeter than salty, others quite salty, and some more metallic or even bitter, but all are somewhat unique, and I enjoy with great satisfaction knowing what a guy tastes like.

Not wanting to waste any more time, and now that my body felt fully relaxed as if I had a massage, I told him that I had to get to work, and we quickly said our goodbyes with a kiss. He apparently didn’t mind kissing me after I ate his sperm babies because it bothers some guys for whatever reason.

Naturally, I wasn’t going to lie to Sarah; rather, I was only going to withhold everything that happened after he agreed to go to a hotel with me.

She then asked me what happened after he agreed to go with me to a hotel. I said that I told him that it would have to be later because I had to get back to work. Okay, so maybe I did lie to Sarah a little.

Later that evening, I met with her in person at her house. She was visibly upset, mostly angry. She spent about 2 hours ranting and raving about what a jerk he was. She told me how she waited for him at his apartment and told him off. How done with him she was, etc.

I listened and nodded; it was all I could do; it was the least I could do. During that time, as she spoke, I began to space off. I began to think about how she and I had now shared the same man, how I knew her experience with him firsthand. I felt closer to her in a weird way. A way that I can only describe as being similar to making love with her, but without having to actually do that.

I put my arm around her shoulder to console her, and in that moment, for the first time, I felt a little bad for both her and him. I’m usually not very empathetic over relationship issues, but this time I was, perhaps out of some guilt.