********PHIL********

When she got home from the last meeting, I was sitting in my chair, waiting. I handed her the flyer I’d found and said, “Well, are you going to, or not?”

She sat down. “You know what I’ve been doing? The meeting I’ve been going to?”

“Honey, I saw the flyer when you first brought it home. I know I mentioned it, but you said no. When I saw it, I ignored it until you started going out with some girlfriends twice a week. When you started…um, when you started roleplaying, um, those very directed roles, I knew what was happening.” 

“Phil, I haven’t, um, made…” and her voice trailed off.

“Laura, don’t pretend with me, please. The role-playing we did, my reaction to our role-playing; didn’t that decide you? Yes or no?”

She hesitated before answering, “What do you want me to decide, Phil? Like you said, your reaction to our role-play says something, right?”

I sat back in my chair.

This will decide the rest of our marriage. Either I’m a cuckold or not, and what kind of cuckold, too. I’ve read enough to know there are lots of different cuckold marriages.

“You know, I’ve wanted to see you with someone else, making love to someone else; I’ve said so.”

*********LAURA********

I can’t sleep; I’m in bed with Phil after he shocked me after getting home from the cuckolding seminar when he asked me if I’m going to do it. He’d known from the beginning what was going on when we’d been role-playing me fucking his friends. 

He’d really gotten into it as much as I had. But when he asked if I was going to actually do it, I didn’t have an answer; I couldn’t answer. He talked about watching, but that makes it ordinary somehow. I’m not even sure I want him to know what I’m doing, like our role-play.

That morning, we both overslept, so we didn’t have time to talk. Despite my distractions at work, I cleared my desk before leaving. 

I stopped on my way home for coffee and to think.

Phil’s willing, but he wants to watch. Can I refuse to let him? How far can I push him to let me decide? 

It took about half an hour before I left and picked up Chinese. Phil was home, so I went into the kitchen and got our chopsticks, plates, and some wine. 

After Phil sat down, I picked up a piece of the Orange Chicken with my chopsticks and offered it to Phil. “Phil won’t be home until ten, Bill. I want what we did a couple of weeks ago. Please, that was incredible, and I’d like it again.”

He took the chicken and then said, “Until ten? You’re sure? I don’t want Phil to know about it.”

“Bill, I want to taste your cock and I want you to cuck him again. Please, put your cock in my…cunt. Yes, my lover, I want you to cum in my cunt again.” I helped him scoot back from the table so I could reach his zipper, unbuttoned his trousers, unzipped them, and pulled his cock out. I took a moment to admire it. “You’ve cucked him once; a second time won’t make any difference.” I grinned at him. “Well, except we’ll have fun again.”

I leaned down and put my mouth around his cock and sucked on it. He put his hands on my head and held it there while he moved his hips to thrust it in my mouth.

********PHIL********

Laura’s got my cock in her mouth pretending she’s sucking Bill; she’s pretending she’s cuckolding me with my best friend. She’s pretending we’re hiding it from me. I’m fucking her mouth. I want to come in her mouth. Fill it with my come. 

“Keep sucking on me. I want to come just like this. I want to make Phil’s wife my cock sucker. I want to blow my load in you, Laura, without him knowing it.”

I forced my hand in her blouse and her bra and gripped her tits, bruising them.

The tension of pretending I was cuckolding my best friend, Phil, and having Laura's mouth on my cock in such a taboo way started me toward my climax. “Laura, Laura, I’m c-coming, Laura.” At my last Laura, I felt I passed the point of no return. My cock exploded with cum filling her mouth.

I forced her head up so I could kiss her and my tongue could search for remnants of my cum. It felt like I was tasting Bill’s cum. 

That was amazing; I think I want Laura, no; I want Laura to cuckold me. I want to watch, but that’s not what Laura seems to want. What she wants or role-plays is more like cheating; she takes advantage of opportunities and fucks someone. 

That’s a no, a hard no! Where does that leave us?

After we finished our Chinese dinner, we watched TV for a bit, ignoring what had happened.

In the morning, Laura was up before me, and after my shower, I found her on the patio, drinking coffee and wearing just a robe.

I walked up to her and opened her robe, showing me her tits; her bruised tits. I leaned over and kissed them, and then kissed her lips. I closed her robe and moved a chair next to her. 

“Laura, last night, it was amazing that role play. What developed seems to me to be akin to you cheating, just fucking people you find an opportunity to fuck. Is that what you want? You went to those meetings, and that’s where you landed?”

*********LAURA********

I was on the patio when Phil came out of the house, dressed. When he leaned over me and attacked my tits, I gave a gush of arousal.

I love him, I don’t want to do anything to hurt him. We both want me to screw other men, but he wants to watch, and that gives me the heebie jeebies. God, heebie jeebies, that’s so dated my dad said it when I was a kid. 

He wants to watch, and I don’t want that. I can’t stand the thought of Phil watching me fucking someone, anyone else.

Phil pulled up a chair next to me. “Laura, last night, it was amazing that role play. What developed seems to me to be akin to you cheating, just fucking people you find an opportunity to fuck. Is that what you want? You went to those meetings, and that’s where you landed?”

I sat there, assimilating what he’d said. I shifted uncomfortably in the chair, trying to think.

“No, that’s…” I stopped there because I needed to think. Eventually, I stood and walked over to the tangelo tree and picked a few, and brought them to Phil. I peeled one and pulled apart some segments, thinking.

“Phil, that's not what I want at all. You’ve said.” I paused. “You’ve said you want to watch me with—other men. I can’t stand the thought of that. You watching me screw other guys. I just can’t.” 

I glanced over at Phil and saw his erection in his pants. And he was shifting uncomfortably in his chair now. “We both want…” I didn’t know what we both wanted; he wanted to watch, and I didn’t want him to.

What do I want? Our role-play was me fucking his friends, but he didn’t know about it. He described it as cheating. That’s what it was; now I can see it. So now what?

“No. I don’t know. Phil, we both need to think.”

We sat on the patio, holding hands until I had to go inside and fix breakfast for us. After breakfast, we didn’t mention the elephant in the room. 

I was distracted most of the day, Monday, trying to decide how I wanted to go forward.

Who’s in charge of who decides whose cock I let fuck me? Olivia’s husband does, for them, but she wants to decide. That’s what I learned from those sessions and talking to the women. The teachers and the other students. Can I trade letting him watch, for the power of choosing my sex partners?

That evening, I got home early and waited for Phil to come home.

“Honey, Friday, I’m going to Time Out, that bar on Sixty-Fifth. I’ve heard it’s a pick-up bar, and I’ll bring someone home to fuck. You can come if you want, but it’s my choice, Phil. I’ll bring him home so you can see it, but I choose. It’s not a promise I’ll always let you watch, but sometimes.”

As Friday approached, we both were getting nervous. This was a big step. We’d pretended, but now it was going to be real. The anticipation excited me, but I dreaded the possible repercussions. 

Following a recommendation from Margo, one of the leaders, I made Phil to help me get ready. 

He helped me bathe, shave, and dress. I made him trim my bush to make it more civilized. Finally, I put perfume on my pulse points and then on my bush and ran it through my bush.

I got my jacket, and we went to dinner. I was anxiously anticipating the rest of the night. Phil’s cock was showing hard in his trousers, but the tremor in his hands showed his angst, his uncertainty about what I intended.

He’s terrified about what’s next. He wants it and he doesn’t. The emotional clash between the two states is intoxicating to me. It’s intensifying my excitement.

“Phil, I can’t wait to pick out the guy tonight.” I leaned over and kissed him. Closing my eyes, I shivered. “I wonder how big his cock’s going to be? Will he be able to get it completely in me?”

I knew I was pushing a vicarious fear button for most men, John Holmes excepted.

“Don’t worry, Phil, yours is okay.” I grinned at him, “Mostly.” And I laughed.

This is fun, teasing him. I’m going to enjoy the real thing when it happens. Edith—I think it was—talked about her first time. How enraptured she felt as his cock was entering her. She felt transported, almost religiously.

I can't wait. The more he feels it, the more I’ll feel it.

********PHIL********

We went out for dinner before looking for Laura’s new friend. When we finished, we headed over to Time Out. It was busy, but there was one table left. I went to the bar, and she sat alone at the table. 

Looking at her, waiting to find her first lover, am I hoping she’ll find someone? I’m nervous about seeing who she picks, or maybe I’m hoping she won’t pick anyone. 

Two men stopped and talked, but they both ended up leaving. The second guy left with someone else and was kissing her on the way out.

We were there for an hour when she stood up and sat next to me. She shook her head and said, “This isn’t working, and we need to talk in the car. Okay?”

In the car, she turned to me, shaking her head. “I can’t do it; I just can’t.”

I looked at her before asking, “What can’t you do?”

Is she saying she’s giving up finding a man to cuck me? Am I hoping that’s what it is? Hell, yes and no. I was looking forward to it and dreading it both. 

“I was talking to those guys, and I kept thinking about you watching, and I couldn't do it. Phil, I’m sorry but I can’t. I can’t.”

She still wants to do it; she wants to cuckold me, fuck someone without me watching. 

I cautiously asked, “So what then?”

“I don’t know. Some women let their husbands watch, sometimes at least. But some absolutely didn’t. So that doesn’t help.” She sat there for a minute before continuing, “It didn’t sink in at the meetings because I was thinking, watch or not watch. There were two women there who sometimes let their husbands listen.”

I let that sink in and said, “Listen? What do you mean, listen?”

“They couldn't see, watch, but they listened from the door…um, the door or…” Her voice trailed off.

I impatiently asked, “Or?”

“One, um, Dana set up a microphone that transmitted to earphones in the next room so her cuckold could listen and hear everything. Some of the other speakers were interested, too. Would that…”

“Would that what?” I asked.

“Would that be close enough to watching for you? I think I could do that: let you listen, even with a microphone.”

I’m realizing that the whiplash with all the starts and stops going on is driving me crazy. If it came to it, I want to know she’s cuckolding me. I want to know she’s fucking other men. Why? I still don’t know that, but it’s true. Hell.

She paused, then said, “Another thing Dana said was, she makes her cuckold, her husband Ed, ask the man she picks to fuck her. She’s not just doing it; he’s involved too. I want you to do that too.”

She wants me to ask to be cuckolded? She wants me to ask the man to fuck my wife? Hell NO!

Or maybe, maybe?

Or maybe yes?

Okay, I know I’ll do it. Double, triple hell. I want her to cuckold me. God, I’d beg them to do it.

“Phil, there’s that chamber dinner dance next week, Friday. I want to do it then. Pick him then, ask him then. My first lover, my first time cuckolding you. I can’t wait to pick him out and watch you ask him.” 

Right, and feel his cock entering you; feel him cum in you. You’ve told me what the women there said it’s like.

Hell, we need to be ready. God, am I looking forward to this or dreading it? I think the answer is yes!

On Saturday, I went online and found what I wanted. Just thinking about what I was ordering got me hard, and by the time I finished, I had to jack off. 

We’ll be picking someone to… to cuck me. She'll be picking a man; someone to fuck Laura. It could even happen tomorrow. 

*********LAURA*******

It’s Thursday, and tomorrow, god, tomorrow, I’ll be picking the man that’s going to fuck me and cuckold Phil. I can’t believe we’re going to do it. I thought it was an exercise in, um, wishful thinking. 

Phil has the microphone set up so he can listen from our office; all that he has to do is ask the man I pick to fuck me. Will he be able to do it? I hope he doesn’t back out. I can almost feel his cock. 

Please don’t back out. Phil, just don’t.

That evening, I resolved I want my pussy smooth for tomorrow. I want my pussy smooth for my lover. 

“Phil, um, we haven’t talked about getting ready for tomorrow, getting me ready for, ah, my date. Tomorrow. 

“I want my pussy smooth for him, and I’d like you to do it for me; shave it.”

I saw Phil tense before he answered. “You want me to shave you? There? For him?”

His face changed into a mask with no emotions showing. 

I’d surprised him. “Yes, I’d like you to, but… I’ll shave the rest, but yes, can, could you do that?”

As I said that, I realized I wanted to make him realize he was helping me cuckold him. I wanted to rub his face in it. He’d agreed to it, and I wanted him to taste it. 

I shaved my regular areas and called him in to do the rest. “I want it smooth for him everywhere. Get it all, Phil." 

When he was done, I was hairless from my scalp to my toes. I made him get everything. 

When he finished, I rubbed my hands over my pussy with lotion, reveling in the new smooth sensation. It was going to be a treat for my lover. 

Phil was looking at my pussy with a hungry look, so I smiled at him and said, “No, you don’t get to touch me until after I’ve been fucked. My next time is for my lover.”

He looks desolate standing there. Am I being too hard on him? 

I looked at him and said, “If you undress, I’ll give you some relief right here. My hands can help.”

He took his pants off, but I said, “Phil, I want you completely naked, and then I’ll jack you off. I want to see you come, right here on the bathroom floor."

When he stripped, I took his cock in my hand with some lotion and said, “Come on, honey, let’s see how far you can do. Just let it out on the floor."

I was stroking it and, with my other hand, fondling his balls. Then I started fisting it the way he did, masturbating. I felt his cock jerking and then it spurted onto the wall. Part of it. 

“God, Laura, god.”

I leaned over and kissed his cock, “I love you, I adore what you’re doing for me. I want to feel him, someone, taking my, my cunt.” I looked up at him and said, “It’s going to be my cunt, isn’t it? After he fucks me, it’s going to be a cunt.”

I cleaned the floor and the wall, and we went to bed.

The next morning, I found a note from Phil saying he couldn’t sleep, so he went to work. 

That night I’d had a dream about me being fucked hard with a cock that couldn’t all fit in my pussy, my cunt. 

I got through work and left an hour early, finding Phil home, sitting at the dining room table with his head resting on his arms. He looked up at me, and I could see he was trembling. 

“Laura, you’re going to go through with it, aren’t you? By tomorrow I’m going to be…hell, you'll have cuckolded me.”

“Yes, I am, and yes, you’ll be my cuckold, Phil. And we’ll both enjoy it.