This Is Not a Love Story (Except It Is)
It’s the story of how I got ghosted, blocked, humiliated, and still somehow married her—don’t ask, just read. Chapter One — The Wedding Reception, or: How We Got Here The room is full of people pretending they haven’t already spilled champagne on themselves. Someone’s uncle is slow-dancing with someone else’s cousin. A toddler is doing what I can only describe as interpretive floor flailing to Stevie Wonder. My dad is three drinks in and just confidently called Sarah’s best friend “Susan,” even though her name is Jess and she’s b...